hey all you readers, I want to tell both of you  that I just got of the phone with David Axelrod of the Gobama campaign. Here’s what he sees as the attack lines for the next deabte, which some newspapers still struggling to sell Democracy to the american people are calling ‘Round II.”

McCain has been instructed by his (younger) handlers to compare the american self-defense instinct to a guard dog in Joe-six pack and hockey-mom’s back yard, and then say “and we, as americans don’t wanna muzzle ‘em!” At least 10% of the intellectuals will see it right away, this subtle attack on Obama’s religion, while the majority of Joe-six pack, and John whiskey bottle, and Barney gambling problem will only sunconsciously hear “muslim.” Another, and much younger strategist suggested the less subtle Approach…McCain: “…that might be okay for liberal Elites, but hardworking americans can’t pay more taxes, you filthy sandy crypto-muslim! (pause) That’s right Abdulh, pray to THIS five times a day!!” (and then flip him off).   And also to freely uses the phrases…..”I was born in America, not Kenya, and maybe my Uncle never ran a marathon, but he built the machines that built the roads upon which America runs..” and…”Maybe that’s what you call a healthcare plan, but my plan would be cheaper if we didn’t have to worry about dirty stinking third world muslim diseases from Africa you sneaky risky Muslim!”

Granted, most strategists don’t expect McCain to go so negative, so fast, and suspect it would sink his struggling campaign. But, on the other hand..what else can he do?

Obama Strategy in a few days

I watched the debate, I admit it. Wait, I don’t have to apologize for my keen interest in political spectacle, 70 million others watched it. It’s a shame to have superbowl numbers, and NOT have a single ad. Can you imagine if there were superbowl type ads during the debate?  Put all THAT money into the bailout, idiots.

Anyway, she exceeded expectations, like the way I expect my blind dates to actually be chimpanzees, then they pleasently surprise me by being human. And why do I want to watch Fargo everytime I hear her speak? She looks like my waitress at the Wafflehouse off the I-15 in Texas, with her teeth, and Saved-by-Jesus eyes, and her walmart hairspray, askin’ me on some early morning if I want “blueberries with my waffles, doggone ya gosh darnit?”. I want to say, ‘fuck the waffles, lady, tell me how you’ll bomb warziristan!” But I restrained myself. I was invited to that Debate watching party. How many times did someone two merlots over their limit say” I think Yomama needs to put lots of ad dollars into Coloroda media marktets. Which ios funny, because if My Mama was on the campaign staff, she probably would…

We are still hiring some more staff to help us better achieve our grand vision, and better serve you, the all important reader. It has been suggested that we hire someone to actually WRITE the grand vision, because as it stands now our guiding principle is “be the best, most original blog out there” but that’s what every blogger thinks. Actually, I suspect what most bloggers are thinking is “God, PLEASE let someone besides my Uncle and two facebook friends read this!”

So yes, we will soon bring in some talented thinker to articulate this Blog’s grand vision, and have it ready for the press conference sometime next month. And don’t worry, we will not palinize the reporters.